...even though, at the time, I thought my problems were the biggest in the world.
I was never popular, even tho for a brief respite in the 1990s, I was an accepted member of the "AOL Party Crowd". There is where I piled up the jokes, the lovers, a couple of drinks, and what I thought what I wanted at the time.
In the present, I just came back from dinner, and my wife was looking at her Facebook app, my son was playing with his android tablet, and the youngest member of the family was snoring because we slipped him a medically approved Mickey, in the hopes that he actually stayed asleep. I, well, I don't get invited to too many parties...well, none, actually.
I looked at myself in the mirror the other day, and for the first time, I noticed that I am beginning to, well, age. I mean, well, it beats the crap out of alternative, but well, it just sort of hit me a tad bit...hard.
It makes me think of the way I am so hard on my oldest...he's 10.
And all he does is sit in his room and rot his brain on video games.
I take them away, he drifts away in his imagination, has no friends, and is the most handsome hermit in history.
I am sad for him. I wish I had his looks, his intelligence, his charm...when he isn't afraid of everything.
I think about the relationship I had with my father...which wasn't a great one, sadly. He handled his business, took care of my brother and I, and we weren't hurting for anything.
But I am sad because, well, I would of traded in the watches, the Atari 2600, and so forth, just for a damn game of catch.
I am sitting here right now, watching "Dancing with the Stars" with my wife, and I remember that my buddy Steve asked if i misplaced my manhood.
I knew he was joking, so I laughed it off...but let's face it...not too many 250 lb (hey, I lost weight) black men watch folks do ballroom dancing and is entertained by that.
I am not sad by that commet...I am sad because, well, I was told the other day that I lost my supposed "ghetto card." Once again, a joke (and God knows I have had my fair share of inappropriate comments in 43 years), but I have heard that for about most of my life...it seems it is a crime to be blessed to have folks who made sure I was educated and, despite my crassness at times, have a semblance of class, without forgetting that he is Black in America...
...even tho America, by its current attitude, doesn't let me forget.
I miss...well...wait...I can't miss what never was. Folks, well, disagreeing without being hateful, a bit of basic human decency, and well, for gods sake, watching each others back.
A guy at an Office Depot, while I was looking for an upgrade for Jared's Nexus 7, allowed him to trade in his old one...even though it was past the return date, for the newer, bigger version.
No charge.
That was pretty cool...tried to impart the lesson on the boy.
Then, because he is a self centered kid at times, forgets to turn in his grandfather's picture for Veteran's Day because he "forgot."
If I told him I was buying him an iPad Mini at 4:17 if it rained, he wouldn't of forgotten that.
So I am sad for our spoiled youth.
I guess I am rattling on...I know there are folks who find my words, well, amusing, thoughtful, controversial, rude, tactless, and loudmouthed.
All true, probably.
But the biggest thing that makes me sad...beyond the lack of human contact, the fact that technology have permeated our lives so much that our kids forgot how to simply play, that there are good women out there in loveless marriages, men who don't appreciate their females, kids who don't have a damned clue what is important unless there is a text involved, and well, the fact that people are selfish sons/daughters of bitches/assholes...
...is that no one seems to care.
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